


breathe (don't you let that heartbeat fall)

by argentae



Series: give me something (to hold onto) [2]
Category: SKAM (TV)
Genre: Conversations, Fluff, Gen, M/M, also more golden trio times because i love all three of them with my whole heart, because isak and even without fluff? don't know her, homework and dinner at the valtersen/bech naesheim houshold, overuse of the words "fond" and "soft", so that should give u an idea of which direction we're taking this in
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-24
Updated: 2017-05-24
Packaged: 2018-11-04 13:21:53
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,201
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10991784
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/argentae/pseuds/argentae
Summary: “Hey, do you want to come over to our place this Friday so we can work on our presentation after school? And that dinner invitation still stands,” Isak says. “I promise I won’t even touch the food, so no need to worry about that.”(alternatively: biology buddies make a presentation, even makes great food and sana talks)





	breathe (don't you let that heartbeat fall)

**Author's Note:**

> ahh so here's another thingy i wrote. it got a bit longer than i expected but ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯. i'm not entirely sure i'm super happy with it & i'm not sure if i got their characterisations really down yet but i had to get it out there before canon ruined it too much lmao. 
> 
> kinda dedicated to awesome_girl and minttobe_treehill who requested a sequel to part one: i hope you guys like it!! you can read without having read the first part though.
> 
> once again, english isn't my first language so tell me if anything sounds off. 
> 
> title from breathe by seafret.

**** The thing is, Sana hadn’t been planning on actually taking Isak up on his dinner offer. But she’s still avoiding Elias (or Elias is avoiding her, she’s not really sure anymore) and her mother keeps giving her that _look_ that just makes Sana want to spill everything even though she _knows_ she can’t and even her own safe room feels off. She feels stuck there, like the walls are closing in if she sits still for too long (but then again, she doesn’t really sit still  –  she can’t concentrate when it’s silent but she also can’t concentrate when there’s noises around, constantly feels her heart hammering at the thought that it’s Yousef). 

Actually asking Isak though – that’s another thing. Every time she thinks there’s a moment and she’s worked up the courage (and swallowed that stubborn pride or hers), she chickens out and the moment passes. She doesn’t want to make them feel uncomfortable, and despite neither Isak nor Even treating her any differently, she still feels like she would be inconveniencing them, coming into their house with her baggage and her moods. 

Her biology buddy (who’s quickly beginning to grow into one of her favourite people to be around, though he won’t hear her admit that to his smug face), however, catches her off guard while they’re packing up their stuff at the end of Wednesday’s class. 

“Hey, do you want to come over to our place this Friday so we can work on our presentation after school? And that dinner invitation still stands,” Isak says. “I promise I won’t even touch the food, so no need to worry about that.”

Isak has been giving her looks as well, though they are far more subtle than her mums. She appreciates that he hasn’t called her out on her coldness. Instead, he’s been acting like nothing is wrong, like she hasn’t been lowkey icing him out. 

So when he asks her that, the heart inside her chest jumps with relief. Outwardly, though, she narrows her eyes at him in mock suspicion. “You promise?” 

Isak rolls his eyes, throwing his backpack around his shoulder. “Listen, Even doesn’t allow me in the kitchen while he’s cooking, says it’s _distracting_ and that I give off _bad cooking vibes_ so you don’t need to worry.” She nods, feeling a little lighter as they walk out of the classroom and Even comes up on Isak’s other side, wrapping his arm around Isak’s waist while Isak is still looking at Sana. It’s easy and casual and it draws a smile out of her.

“But you’ll come?” Isak asks.

“I’ll come,” she nods, after a second’s silence

“You're coming for dinner?” Even chirps up happily, peeking over Isak’s head to meet Sana’s eye. “Finally someone who will really appreciate my cooking. This one here lived off of basically nothing for a year so he thinks everything that has more taste and substance than instant noodles is worth three Michelin stars.” 

Isak finally turns away from her only to shoot his boyfriend an overly insulted look. “Excuse me? I cooked! I lived on my own for year and you think I can’t cook?” 

“Eskild has told me how he left his leftovers on your shelf so you wouldn’t starve,” Even replies seriously. 

“Well, maybe your cooking is just amazing and stunning and you don’t appreciate how much I appreciate it,” Isak mutters grumpily. 

Even draws out his _aw_ for some extra effect until Isak elbows him in the stomach, but they’re both glowing, radiating happiness. Sana thinks she would be a little jealous over anyone else showing off their love to her face like that but right now she just feels light. 

“You two are gross,” she tells them, though she thinks the fact that she’s smiling fondly while saying it might be diminishing the effect of the insult a little. 

-

She’s surprised by how easy it is, going with Isak on Friday. The two of them fall into easy conversation, debating the benefits of wind mill parks versus solar panels and Isak tells her about the book he’s been reading, tells her she can borrow it when he’s done because he thinks she’ll find it really interesting too and she comes to the strange realisation that somewhere along the way this grumpy teenage boys has come to find out the books she likes to read in her spare time.

Even isn’t home yet when they get to the apartment (“He’s been working on a movie to get into film school next year,” Isak tells her, beaming with pride, “It’s coming along really nicely but he often stays at school for a little while longer. Says he can’t concentrate with me here.” Sana snorts) so they make themselves comfortable. 

Isak explains with only some minor embarrassment that they haven't really gotten around to buying a dinner table or chairs yet, so they sit on the floor around the coffee table and it’s… it’s fun. Surprisingly so. With all the tension that hanging around with her girls has been bringing with it the past week, she feels like a weight has been lifted off her shoulders as she laughs at Isak trying to defend the amount of Gabrielle songs on the playlist he put on (though he does it halfheartedly, with a strange little smile on his face) and the two of them even actually manage to get to working productively on their presentation. 

When Even barges in with an exuberant “Honeys, I’m home!” she delights in seeing Isak’s face light up before he manages to school his expression into something resembling seriousness as he calls back “We’re _working_ over here!” in a semi-berating tone.

“My hard working biology nerds,” Even says fondly as he leans against the door post and looks down at them, his jacket thrown over his shoulder, his hair messed up from the wind. “I’ll leave you to it.”

Before he’s able to leave the room though, Isak makes a small noise and Sana can barely keep herself from snorting again as Even turns around, raising his eyebrows in question. Isak doesn’t say anything, just furrows his eyebrows and reaches out one hand. 

“What’s wrong?” Even asks, pretending like he doesn't understand what’s going on. “Sana, Isak seems to be trying to communicate something to me but I just for the life of me cannot figure out what it is.” He exchanges a look with Sana, shooting her a quick smile before pretending to be taking Isak seriously again.

“Even,” Isak whines. 

“Yes dear?”

Isak groans. “I hate you.” 

“That’s unfortunate,” Even replies lightly. “Guess I’m going to the kitchen now so you two can get to work again. Wouldn’t want to distract you, now would I?” 

Isak looks like he’s going to combust. 

“No, Even!” Even turns back once more, a smile playing around his lips. Isak sighs dramatically before he reluctantly grinds out, “Will you _please_ come here and kiss me?” 

“Oh, so _that’s_ what you wanted!” Even grins as he finally makes his way over to where they’re sitting on the floor. “Next time you _could_ just use your words, you know? I’m very happy to oblige.” 

Isak makes a hmpf-like sound before tilting his head up to meet Even for a kiss. It’s short, nothing too in her face (though it wouldn’t be the first time), but it’s sweet and when they pull apart their faces stay close together for a little, noses touching, as they drink each other in. 

“Did you have a good day?” Isak asks quietly and Even nods with a smile. 

“Yes, and I’ll tell you two all about it during dinner, which is what I’m going to prepare now. Ready to let me go?” 

Isak gives him one of his world renowned eye rolls, pulling him in for one more quick kiss before softly pushing Even up and towards the kitchen. When he turns to Sana and sees the look on her face the only thing he does is shake his head and mutter a quick “shut up”, though he can’t keep the smile off his face either. 

She raises her hands in defence, pretending to lock her lips and throw the keys away before she turns to their work again and he joins her. 

-

Even calls out to them to put away their work and a couple of minutes later he comes out carrying a huge tray with on it a range of all equally delicious looking dishes. She wants to tell him he shouldn’t have gone through all that effort but as she looks his way and sees him beam happily, looking at her with an expectant smile, she can’t do anything but tell him it looks amazing. 

“All vegetarian, all halal,” he tells her, proudly looking over his work. “I don’t go all out like this every night, can’t spoil Isak _too_ much, but it’s Friday and we have a special guest so…” He trails off, taking his place opposite of the two of them, and Sana feels a ridiculous amount of fondness well up in her chest. 

Over dinner, Even tells them about his movie, how he’s been working on it after school with one of their teachers who apparently used to work as a director as well and has been coaching him a bit. He gets so passionate, waving around with his arms and explaining how he’s going to make this specific shot work and how beautifully it’s going to blend into the next scene. Even is all sparkly eyed joy and enthusiasm, is all wide gestures and smiles and she loves how he sweeps her up in it as well, how by the end of his little speech she feels the adrenaline and the excitement. _This hasn’t changed_ , she thinks, remembering all the times he’d sat at their kitchen table, telling the boys about some amazing film he’d seen and they’d pretend to get annoyed but really they were all getting swept up in his stories as well. Even seems to have that effect on the people around him and she loves it. 

Despite the fact that she’s here, that they invited her and they all seem to be having fun, she’s a little taken aback when Even’s gaze meets hers at some point during the evening and he seems to soften. His head is tilted slightly and there’s something familiar and fond in the way his smile broadens. She’s been avoiding all of these annoying _looks_ people seem to be giving her, but she doesn’t feel scrutinised now. For a second she thinks he’s going to say something, but then Isak starts talking about the universities Even’s applying to for next year and the moment passes. 

-

After dinner, Even convinces the two of them to show him their presentation. He pretends to be very interested, nodding with a very serious expression on his face all the way throughout and applauding loudly after they finish with a flourish and a bow. 

“I understood absolutely nothing but it sounded so interesting I _almost_ regret dropping biology this year,” he tells them sincerely and Isak rolls his eyes but kisses him anyway. Sana simply smiles.

-

Isak insists on doing the dishes, since Even was the one sweating in the kitchen to make dinner, and he also insists Sana stays where she is and relaxes because “you’re our guest, and despite what all of the liars and slanderers around here,” Even gets a pointed look, “might want you to believe I am the _master_ of hosting”. Even is only allowed in the kitchen to get the two of them a cup of tea, and a couple of minutes later he joins Sana, who’s now sitting with her back against the couch. 

“Here you go,” he says quietly, handing her the tea. 

“Thanks.” 

They’re both quiet for a moment and Sana revels in how comfortable it is. She knows she isn’t expected to say anything but she also knows that if she wanted to, she could. Even’s simply sitting there, warming his hands on the mug of tea, not asking anything of her, but silently offering. 

Suddenly, Sana’s realising with an alarming amount of feelings that that might be exactly what she’s so desperately needed and in that moment it doesn’t seem that hard at all to open her mouth and tell him, “I haven’t really talked to Elias. Since Friday, I mean. He’s been out a lot and I didn’t want to see him. I’m not sure what I would do if I did.”

She shoots Even a quick look and he’s simply looking back, expression open, inviting her to go on. It’s a revelation, to feel like she’s not being judged and she hates it. This moment shouldn’t be an exception and yet it is only now that she realises how much she’s always anticipating it, all the people judging her and making up their minds about her before she’s even said a word.

“I think the girls are going to throw me out of the buss.” The words hurt as she pushes them out but at least they’re _out_ now. “Or, they were going to. I stepped out myself before they could but. Vilde has been talking to the Pepsi-Max girls behind my back. I heard two of them talk about it in the bathroom. They didn’t know I was in there but…” She’s not looking at Even anymore, stubbornly keeps her gaze fixated on the cup of tea in her hands, on the loose thread on the carpet, on the heart carved into the coffee table, on _anything_ but the slight burning behind her eyes. 

“What?” Isak’s voice rings loudly in the silence. He’s standing in the doorway, hands still soapy from the dishwater. “They wouldn’t be able to throw you out. They wouldn’t be able to do that, right?” 

He’s aghast, unsettled, like he can’t believe what he’s hearing, eyebrows furrowed together in a concerned frown as he looks from Even to Sana and back to Even. It’s funny how his distress on her behalf actually calms her a little. She hears him move closer, sitting down opposite of them, his back against the coffee table. Even and his long legs tangle together, easily fitting in each other’s space.

“They can, though,” she shrugs. “It’s not like I actually tell them what to do or something.” 

“But– why would they?” He sounds so genuinely confused and looks so deflated at the thought that that warm feeling is flooding her chest again. “Are they all– I mean, does Eva know too?” 

She shrugs again. “I don’t know. I don’t think so, I just heard those two girls and Noora said she’s stepping out as well if I’m not joining anymore so I guess. I just don’t–” she falters, takes a deep breath and tries again. “I don’t know what to do.” 

All three of them are silent for a while, the only sound being that of tea being sipped from time to time. 

“I’m not sure what you should do either,” Even admits and when his voice breaks through the silence it doesn’t cut, it glides. “You can talk to them about it. If you think the rest of the girls aren’t in on it at least you’ll have everything out in the open then. With stuff like this… It’s really not good to keep it all to yourself. It can be so damaging to your own mind if you’re stuck with your thoughts all the time.” He halts for a moment before continuing with the inevitable, “And if they were in on it…” 

“Then they don’t deserve you,” Isak finishes his sentence with a sort of angry conviction. “If they really… They don’t deserve you, not even a little. You can sit with us at lunch if you’re uncomfortable sitting with them. The boys all think you’re cool. I just.”

He meets her gaze, jaw clenched, and the look in his eyes so very serious. When he speaks again, his voice is a little more quiet but still filled with the same power. “Sana, people don’t just get to treat you like that. You’re like. One of the best people I know.” And after a second. “You’re my friend and you’re _not_ alone.” The way words she’d so harshly thrown in his face Monday now boomerang their way back to her makes her heart ricochet. From the corner of her eye she sees Even shoot his boyfriend a look before turning to her again. Instead of all her heavy thoughts, it’s the weight of the boys’ sincerity resting on her shoulders now, and while it’s strange, it’s not uncomfortable.

She’s quiet for a long time, just breathing. Isak’s words aren’t just going to eradicate all of the injustice. Her heart hurts over the thought of losing the girls. She knows loads of people won’t care that she’s _his friend_ if that friend is wearing a hijab and goes to the mosque and prays. She knows _he_ knows that. But something restless in her chest settles. The boys’ silent conviction is pulsing off of them, and she feels the meaning of it penetrate her bones. She feels known and she feels like even if everything else seems to be falling apart, right now she allows the two of them to wrap her up in this cocoon of warmth and safety and protection they seem to have created here. 

-

They insist on walking her home, despite her sighs and “I’m a strong, independent woman”s. 

“You don’t think I know that?” Isak looks at her with ridiculously raised eyebrows, pointing at himself. He curls into Even’s side immediately after they step into the slightly chilly spring night, looking uncommonly small for someone so tall (then again, Even is an actual giant so). “Even, can you believe that?” 

Even hums his agreement, though he shares a look with Sana after he pecks Isak’s cheek. The walk is mostly silent, the sounds of the sleeping city surrounding them. It’s good. Isak’s _you’re not alone_ keeps echoing in her head, pulsing inside her – every time it fades out it’s also already there again. 

“You’ve gone soft,” she tells Isak when she can’t deal with the way his lips curl into a small smile every time he looks at her anymore. 

Before Isak can refute that statement, Even replies for him. “Nah, Isak was soft all along. It was just hidden a bit deeper than everyone expected. But, we didn’t give up and look at the results we yielded.” And well, she can’t really argue with that. 

They reach her house just fine and she turns around to face the two of them. “Thanks,” she tells them softly. “For bringing me home. And the dinner and – the rest. Just everything.” 

“Always. You know where to find us,” Isak tells her. “Goodnight, Sanasol.” 

“Night, Sana,” Even says with a soft smile, and then the two of them are turning around. She watches them, arms wrapped around each other, until they turn the corner, then goes inside. Her mother meets her in the hallway. 

“Good night?” she asks. 

Sana nods, a smile playing on her lips. “Good night.” 

**Author's Note:**

> come talk to me on [tumblr](http://minjard.tumblr.com) or [twitter](http://twitter.com/argentae)!


End file.
